Welcome to Authentically_mi! My name is Michelle but everyone calls me Mimi. I'm a curious adventure seeker intrigued by the world around me. My brand is about all things authenticity, self love, self discovery, healing, empowerment and travel. My blog will bring you adventures, travel reviews, resources, tips, and more!
This should really go without saying, but I often see different scenarios where people often avoid giving a sincere apology when the offense more than warrants it. There are enough options for you to choose from, but I’m sure we all can recall a time where we were owed an apology we never received. Today we’re going to talk not so glamorous side to adulting and why we should always apologize when necessary.
“I’m not sure where the myth came from that women lack accountability, but I am here to break that mold.”
Life has a funny way of testing us to make us grow. Some lessons are more painful than others and I’m sure we can all relate to those difficult moments. The saying “hurt people hurt people” is so undeniably true and its not enough to just recognize it. From our primary years to adulthood, we all have at least one experience where we were left hanging with no apology in sight. Emotions can tempt us to do things that doesn’t necessarily align with who we are and that can hurt those close to us. I’m not sure where the myth came from that women lack accountability, but here I am to break that mold. Apologizing when necessary is simply taking full accountability for your actions when you’ve done something wrong or hurt someone. Usually our first reaction is to defend our actions without first taking into thought how our actions make other people feel. We don’t get to tell people how to react, despite this toxic, widespread belief that we should. When you truly value your relationships, you do what you can to keep communication open to solve disagreements because you appreciate the peace that real relationships bring.
“Intimacy cannot thrive in an environment where honest conversations don’t occur”
Many arguments in close relationships stem from various misunderstandings. Communication is something I value deeply for this very reason. I can be woman enough to admit that I’ve had very toxic moments where the absolute worst has come out of me. Where all I wanted to do was blame the other person for making me feel some kind of way to cause my reaction. Intimacy cannot thrive in an environment where honest conversations don’t occur. Creating a healthy environment means we acknowledge the good, bad and the ugly within ourselves and how that affects us in the way that we relate to other people. Ignorance is not bliss here and it never will be. We all have our own issues we deal with and life can get pretty hard and I’m not exception that rule. Still, it is no excuse to pacify or neglect shitty behavior. Take a moment as necessary to breathe and collect your thoughts. I try to keep in mind that no matter how frustrated I get, responding with more negative energy has NEVER given me the results I was looking for. It usually adds gas to my already lit fire and makes situations even worse.
Our children look up to us and pay us more attention than we give credit too. Sometimes we owe them apologies too. I stress that because I am not a do as I say, not as I do kind of parent. I make sure to embody the characteristics that I am trying to teach my child. That means being humble enough to have humility to stop and say I was wrong and apologize and it doesn’t matter who I’m talking to. Our children need to see these qualities in us to set a true example. Too often we operate from the ego, too big and empowered to lower ourselves to apologize. Silence is not an apology, be grown enough to accept and admit when you’ve messed up and try to fix it!
Apologizing when necessary is flat out the right thing to do and we all should encourage it more. Seek to understand vs confront and watch your life change. Let me know your thoughts below!
Single and stigma probably aren’t two words one would normally put together in a positive sense, but yet here we are. As most of us grow and progress in age, we tend to equate that to a fine bottle of wine getting better with time but there is still this unspoken stigma on single women. I’m here to tell you why that is total bs and what I think will help change the narrative.
” Too many people settle just to say they have someone and that’s not my idea of a successful union “
Most of us grew up with the expectation that marriage meant you made it. Not only is this outdated but its a superficially small way of looking at life. The stigma of something being wrong with older single women is often times baseless. There is nothing wrong with you because of your relationship status or lack there of. Too many people settle just to say they have someone and that’s not my idea of a successful union. Marriage is important but its not the determining factor of life and death and we need to stop treating it as such. There should be more importance placed on marrying the RIGHT person that gives your union longevity vs rushing to meet the age quota only for it to deteriorate a few years down the road. I’m by no means knocking the value and sacredness of the matrimonial union, only shedding light on the fact that there are other things to work towards and be proud of.
Times have changed drastically from when our grandparents were dating. Back then, it was the norm to marry young and fast, starting families and building from scratch. The economy was much better and good paying wages made it feasible for the husband to work while the wife tended to the home and children. The flip side to this was many of these wives were solely dependent on their husbands for everything from finances to survival. This created an unequal balance of power, leaving many women with very few options to leave even if she desperately desired to do so.
” … but that doesn’t mean we devalue marriage. The dynamics have changed from a need to a want. “
Women of today are competing and occasionally excelling beyond our male partners. We are no longer dependent on men for survival, but that doesn’t mean we devalue marriage. The dynamics have changed from a need to a want. I look at marriage as a lifetime partnership that has many sectors under its umbrella. Not only are we lovers, but best friends, business partners, supporters and cheerleaders who will share the responsibility of raising a family and leaving a legacy for your children and grandchildren to build upon.
Your single season is supposed to be the time where you heal, rebuild and truly reconnect with yourself. This is where you discover who you truly are without any outside interference. The single season is when you are truly free to live on your own terms and the optimal time when you should act on your curiosity. You may discover you have a love for wine festivals, reading, traveling or whatever your into. We all handle this process differently and in a multitude of ways but the fact that someone is taking time to heal and grow before bringing past baggage into another relationship should be encouraged. Hurt people hurt people and the only way to break that cycle is to recognize the reason behind our own toxic behavior and heal. Some of us come out stronger and better prepared for our next relationship and others may come out feeling like long term relationships or marriage is not for them. Everything isn’t for everyone and that’s worth respectfully acknowledging.
I’ve noticed among women there is sometimes a condescending tone from married women towards single women and I never understood why. While marriage is definitely something to be proud of, your relationship status is no stipulation of progress of a good life if that’s all you have to show for it. Have we all not seen the divorce statistics lately? The divorce rate is high as hell and more likely to happen the younger you marry.
” We love to preach about being equally yoked but that extends much further than finances. “
Marriage traditionally was a business partnership. It was only in the last few generations that we have adapted to marrying for love. Love should be present whenever marriage discussions are underway, but we cannot forget about the business and character aspects of the people we love so much. Love alone will not foster a good marriage nor will it raise a family. We love to preach about being equally yoked but that extends much further than finances. Is this person also satisfying me mentally, emotionally, physically and spiritually as well? These are some of the things I ask myself because I want something that will stand the test of time. I’m very aware that even with the most planning, things still can go wrong but that’s no reason not to prepare and aim for the best.
Your relationship status doesn’t speak for your entire life. We should be proud of the things we accomplish on our own with education, work, entrepreneurship, traveling the world and beyond. Changing this narrative will require honest discussions and open minds to hear, understand and respect perspectives different from our own. This includes checking our judgement and the root of our opinions. The beautiful thing about life is that we all coexist but have totally different realities. What may work for me may not work for the next person and that’s ok! The emphasis should be put on the fact that we are indeed different, which means our goals, aspirations and actions will be different and the respect for our own worlds should be given freely. What are your views on the single season? Do you think a stigma on unwed older women still exists? Let me know your thoughts and opinions!
Goal planning kind of sounds like work and may not be at the top of your list of never-ending things to do. Unfortunately an essential part to adulting includes having some type of order and setting goals, if we ever want to achieve anything in life. Goals are the plans we set to master across many different sectors in life. This can include your health and fitness goals, self care and parenting goals or maybe career and financial goals. The options are plentiful whichever you decide, but I’m here to share with you my 8 goal planning tips to success!
1.Think about it. In order to set goals, you first have to know what you want to accomplish in life. Goals are not limited to range or size so while the possibilities are endless its good to keep them realistic. Dream big, but make sure you have a plan to follow through. Some of my current goals include starting my own business, pay off my debt, getting into the best shape of my life and building a portfolio of investments and properties.
2. Write down your goals. To keep things organized, keep a detailed list of what your goals are from most to least important. Then separate them into daily (or weekly), short term (monthly, quarterly, ect), long term (1-10 year plans, retirement) goals. Once I have some kind of structure as to what I want and when, I begin writing. I try to be very specific on what I want and focus on the end result and what how I will feel once I get it. This is a great time to slip in a little manifestation with your thoughts and intentions focused on your future.
3. Strategic Planning. This step is not as intimidating as it sounds. We already know our goals and our timeline so now its time to pull it all together into a plan to make it reality. Since one of my goals is to own properties, my strategic plan would include making sure my finances are in order and if they aren’t, make a plan to get in compliance. That means paying off debt, making sure my credit report is clean and accurate, saving money for down payments and such. This step is doing the necessary ground work to prepare a solid foundation for your goals to grow on.
4. Creating a schedule. Once you have a plan for your goals, you need to set up just exactly how you plan to achieve success. A schedule helps tremendously with time management and keeping you accountable for your progress. This doesn’t mean you have to rush through it, just have something steady in place to keep you consistent but not overwhelmed. My schedule consists of reading a financial management book for one hour a day as well as weekly check ins on my debt reduction plan. I have been aggressively attacking my debt this year and am proud to say I can see the end of the tunnel! Operation financial freedom is near completion!
5. Execution. This is actually the easiest part. Don’t overthink it too much and just start. You’ve done all of the hard work already, this step is just putting that work in motion. Executing your plan means being consistent with the schedule you created, no excuses. As with any new thing, it takes some adjusting to get used to change, but becomes second nature after you’ve been doing it awhile. Download a time management app or set alarms on your phone. Resist the urge to fall back into your comfort zone and keep the momentum going.
6. Find Your Rhythm . Ahh those adjustments you find can sometimes be a real pain. Sometimes we learn through trial and error that pieces of our schedule just doesn’t work or fit correctly. This is exactly why I included this step. Its important to evaluate early on to not waste time with methods that don’t bring you desired results. Tweaks and minor changes are unavoidable for an efficient process, you are supposed to grow and build on your mistakes. These are the growing pains of change but I promise it doesn’t last long. Finding your rhythm is crucial to keeping you motivated throughout the process of working smarter not harder.
7. Accountability . The success or failure of your goals usually tends to fall back on accountability. Its so easy to be motivated to do something new initially, but when that motivation fades and you flat out don’t feel like doing it is when you’ll need that extra push. Some people are more accountable than others but this is where good support system friends and family come in (social media friends count too!). If you need that extra push, share your goals and plans with someone close to you who can help keep you accountable. Its like planting a garden. You can’t prepare the soil, plant your seeds and walk away. You must tend to them consistently until they are big enough to thrive on their own. Same concept applies here.
8. Reflections. Hindsight really is 20/20 and our mistakes are the best teachers if we all ourselves to learn from them. Going back over the things that went really well or really bad is how you grow and get better in life. You may find that your schedule was too stringent and you didn’t require the amount of time you thought you would or that you need a bigger savings and must budget more. That’s a crucial detail in adjusting your schedule and time management, freeing yourself to devote more time to other things. Its all trial and error but don’t let it consume you.
Do you goal plan often? If so, what ‘s your process? I hope you have found my advice to be helpful, let me know your thoughts down below!
As you all know, brunch chronicles are a favorite of mine and this feature was no different. I’ve never been here before but was excited to try it out. Located in a strip mall with plenty of parking, it was easy to get to. The brunch hours here were listed from 10:00 am – 2:00 pm. We arrived right before 1:00 and there wasn’t much of a crowd but I certainly complaining. Our server was friendly, prompt and attentive.
The brunch drink menu wasn’t that extensive, but they did offer a few mimosa and bloody Mary options, with a full bar in case you need something on the rocks. I opted for the pineapple mimosa and water of course! It was just enough juice to taste but left the champagne taste to savor.
The brunch menu options were plentiful! I was torn between the shrimp and grits, the lump crab or the classic omelet and the Pan Purdue (French toast, bacon and hashers). I inquired about the cinnamon roll French toast option and our waitress explained that it was actual cinnamon rolls friend the same way as French toast and served with buttercream and caramel icing. I was sold!
The French toast was heaven and very filling! I even had enough to bring home despite arriving with my stomach on E. I always try to portion control my meals to still eat what I want but not fall too far off track. Balance lol. Overall Passion the Restaurant was a great experience and I plan to come back!
Juneteenth is an American holiday popular within the African American community that commemorates the June 19, 1985 announcement of the abolition of slavery in the Confederate States. It was on this day that union soldiers arrived in Galveston, TX to announce that the war had ended and that the enslaved African Americans were now officially free, physically anyway.
If you know your history, you’ll notice a discretion with the date. The Emancipation Proclamation by President Lincoln became official on January 1, 1863, two years prior. There are many stories floating around about why they weren’t informed sooner, some claim the man who was to deliver the message was murdered and others think this was a deliberate act to continue receiving free labor. I tend to agree with the later, but no matter the reason, we all weren’t “free”.
Here I am now some 156 years later reflecting on the horror my ancestors faced and the sacrifice they made for us. I am a native black american with my lineage stretching back to the 1870 census and beyond. I ponder the time in between now and then, how far we have come and how far we still have to go. There has been great efforts put into hiding, alternating and downright erasing a large part of history. Many who live in this great nation don’t even know the true history of the land they inhabit. The United States of America is the land of opportunity solely because of the forced labor of my ancestors and the genocide of Native American’s.
I am located in the area where the first slave ships were said to arrive in 1619, the 400th year anniversary. Energetically, I have felt a number of things; anger, sadness, rage, acceptance, and honor to name a few. Many people want us to be ashamed of our history, but I’m not. It says a lot for my ancestors that experienced and made it out of Chattel Slavery, the worst of its kind in the entire world. Make no mistake this isn’t oppression Olympics, but lets not pretend to not know and recognize the vast differences.
There has been a lot of buzz about reparations and correcting the wrongdoings of the US government. I recognize the #ADOS (American Descendant of Slaves) movement for being involved in the ground work and pushing the fact based initiative all the way to the floor of the House of Representatives in Washington DC last week. While there has been a lot of push back around this movement, its important to keep emotions in check while looking at factual data and understanding why so many are standing behind it. There are many supportive, conflicted and opposing views and while everyone is entitled to their own opinions, whats crystal clear is this conversation is long overdue.
I’m thankful for the perseverance of those who came before me and I will continue to celebrate and shine light on the forgotten.
Good afternoon and Happy Thursday! I took a bit of time to myself here recently to disconnect and do some introspective maintenance. I have definitely missed writing, but I needed to reconnect with my vision and where I was going. This journey to self love is a never ending, winding road that can occasionally produce a few bumps. Its all apart of the process! I wanted my blog post to reflect what I was currently doing and how I got here. Here are 10 things I’ve learned along the way.
1-Boundaries Boundaries BOUNDARIES! I had to put the extra emphasis here to imply how important this is. Your boundaries set the stage for what you will and will not allow from your loved ones and strangers alike. Now some of you may be wondering why this matters. Having weak boundaries will wreck havoc on your life because you will always be susceptible to the wants and needs of others, often neglecting your own. Boundaries are there to ensure your needs are met, your space isn’t violated and a show of confidence that you will only entertain respectful and pleasant interactions. A big part of enforcing this is saying what you mean and meaning what you say. You have to be unapologetic and firm if you want to be taken serious. Just as children can pick up when they can get over on their parents, your peers are the same way. If you don’t stand up for yourself, your sending the message that you and your wants don’t really matter. You absolutely matter and should conduct yourself in a way that speaks for you. Be accommodating but don’t let yourself get run over.
2- Be True To Yourself. This one varies by the individual but the message is still the same. Honor yourself by doing the things that resonate with you. Find what makes you happy and keep it close. Many times we play the part to fit in and it might work for a while but you will soon experience a sense of dissatisfaction in your life. We can’t live for other people and we shouldn’t have to endure that prison. Being true to you means saying no sometimes, it means listening to your body and making the best decisions for you despite what others think or say. This means being honest about our feelings and your desires in life. This is about honoring that soul inside that gives us life! Work and family is hard as hell to balance and sometimes responsibilities triumph our immediate wants and as bad as we want to do nothing, we can’t quite do that. I get it and experience this often, but I’ve learned to make up for it in other ways.
3- Regularly Scheduled Me Time! That’s right, this is absolutely necessary! This is how I keep myself happy, balanced and in order. Working hard is the key to success but burnouts are REAL and we don’t talk about them nearly enough. Some of us spend more time working than we do at home so we have to purposely step away and play hard sometimes too. While the amount of free time will vary depending on circumstance, I think we all can agree that getting out of house to unwind can do you a world of good! Whether its a happy hour, massage, brunch, a vacation, shopping or whatever it is you love, make sure to carve out that time just for you. When my daughter was younger, I used to feel guilty about leaving her with babysitters to enjoy myself. I started to notice when I did things to make me happy, I was naturally happier in other parts of my life as well and it tremendously eased the stress I was carrying all week. Find your happy and just do it!
4- Happiness Is An Inside Job! This is something I had to learn the hard way, but when I tell you the lesson stuck, it stuck big time. I’m naturally very observant and the societal norm has been to “find someone who makes you happy and live happily ever after.” This is so incorrect and leads me to wonder if this perception has anything to do with why the divorce rate is so high. The thing about life is we all have free will and putting your happiness in the hands of another is giving away too much control. We all want and desire love, we’re human and made for companionship, but to put the responsibility of your happiness on someone else is selfish and lazy. Only we have the power to decide our moods and temperaments and only we can change them. We mistake the influence others have on our happiness as them “making” us happy and that just isn’t the case. When you finally learn and accept that it all starts with you, I promise your perception will change. You become a force to be reckoned with because you aren’t easily swayed. When your happiness comes from within, no one can rob you of that unless you give the ok to do so. Take your power back!
5- Love Your Own Company! This is pretty self explanatory but I needed to emphasize this! How can you expect someone else to love and be up under you when you don’t love and want to be with yourself? There are many adults wondering through life, jumping from relationship to relationship, losing a piece of themselves with every new encounter. These actions reek of desperation and a fear of being alone. There is nothing to fear when alone, we cannot run from ourselves. I think the root of why people run from themselves is because they don’t want to address the person in the mirror and that’s a huge problem. Learning to love your own company is becoming comfortable with the uncomfortable feelings you may have. Its accepting every bit of yourself, the good and the bad. Its about accountability and owning up to the choices you’ve made in life. Once you reach full acceptance, you will notice that being alone isn’t bad at all. You might end up craving that sacred alone time.
6- Sisterhood Is Important! Your tribe has a huge influence on your vibe. Women are notorious for being catty, but what I see is a rise in sisterhood and I couldn’t be happier. When we can come together, support and uplift one another, we become a strong collective group. Support systems are everything in life and having your soul tribe near is priceless. We are not each others enemies or competition. There is more than enough for us all to get the bag. Everything isn’t a competition and we achieve our goals faster by working together. When we can show genuine love, respect, support and encouragement, we open the door to new potential relationships that can last a lifetime
7- Be Confident In Yourself and Your Journey. No two self love paths are the same. We may share similarities but our purpose is distinctly ours and sometimes it can get very lonely. Ascension and growth isn’t all love and light and it triggers you to break old beliefs. Stand firm in your power and trust the process. What is meant for you will never miss you and we have to learn to take comfort in that. We have to learn to truly be happy for others even when our time hasn’t come. Its easy to feel bitter or discouraged but these are NOT the emotions we want to manifest more of. Fake it til you make it if you have to, but get in the habit of genuinely being happy for those around you. Grateful and thankful feelings are the ingredients to manifesting our desires, it doesn’t hurt to cheer someone else along the way! I often times felt confused, lost, isolated and more walking this path but I didn’t give up and the growth and glow I’ve gained is the fruit of that labor. Seek help or advice if need be. None of us have all the answers. When I put my ego to the side, I humbled myself to seek and learn as much as I could. Nothing worth having comes easy, remember that always and keep going!
8- Your Perception is Your Reality. Isn’t it amazing to think about how two people can be in the same room, witness the same things but have totally different perceptions? Perception is objective because we all have our own and it is fueled by our thoughts. Our thoughts really do control our lives! What you focus on is what you will see more of. Many of us learned these lessons the hard way, but this one was the most profound for me. When you think negative of yourself, it shows and your energy is something that you cannot hide. This is hard to change but its not impossible.
9- Your Health is Your Wealth. This is something we take for granted far too often! We are only given one body in this life, so it makes sense to take care of it. Rising is age and increasing health issues isnt the time to focus on better habits. Making good habits early on increases the likelihood you will keep it up. Our society seems to focus on responding to problems rather than preventing them. There is a lot that goes on that the average person is unaware of, but its our job to be diligent. We all know that the best tasting foods are the absolute worst for us nutritionally and the numerous pesticides and chemicals injected is causing our health to decline. Its a viscous cycle we must break away from, but we have to first acknowledge it exists and have the sustainability to carry through change. If we can prioritize watching our favorite show with undivided attention, we can sacrifice as hour to exercising. Time management and motivation are crucial, you cant just talk about it you have to be about it.
10- Protect Your Peace! If I had to choose a favorite from this list, it would be this one! Peace of mind is priceless and its our job to filter out the bs. Protecting my peace means honoring being true to myself at all times. It means removing myself from people or places that threaten my peace. Basically, its how I keep the energy around me good. I only have control over myself and the energy I emit, and while I cant control others (not that I would want to) I can control your access to me. I was often times a person who never said no, despite my brain screaming the words internally. The things we see on the news, on social media and sometimes right in front of our very eyes are riddled with triggers. This world and the things that go on can easily make the happiest person depressed but that result serves no one. Be observant but heavily filter the information you take in and become familiar with your limits and unplug as necessary. Protect the peace and essence of your reality.
While I feel I could of kept going, this list is a pretty good start at what I still do to maintain myself while growing and learning. There are times that we are the teachers and the students and with an infinite amount of knowledge, that unlikely to change. How has your self love journey been and what has been your most prominent lessons? Let me know down below!
When I first heard the legendary Pharrell Williams was pitching a festival idea to the city of Virginia Beach, my ears perked up. You see, while Virginia has its perks, a common big complaint is the lack of things to do. Pharrell decided to conquer one of the most controversial weekends of the year to pull this off… Beach weekend. Beach weekend is always the last weekend in April and has become an unofficial tradition of college students packing the beach the week before finals. The controversy comes from the past incidents of violence and vandalism, sparking tense debates around the area. Pharrell emphasized the need for structure and activities to keep people occupied and he was spot on.
To say that this festival was amazing is an understatement. This festival drew in large crowds and for the first time in years, there was no violence. I didn’t really know what to expect, especially because it was the first year, but I trusted Pharrell and his vision and it was better than anything I could of imagined. For us locals this is huge and something to be celebrated, especially with over 40k people. This festival brought all kinds of people together no matter their ethnic background, beliefs or politics. From the epic line up of performances, surprise guests, food, art, cultural events and discussions, Trap Karaoke, dance competitions, the custom Adidas basketball court on the beach and so much more… there was literally something for everyone.
The festival began with a rough start on Friday, with rain ruining and eventually cancelling the first day. While he didn’t have to, Pharrell refunded everyone for that and more than made up for it over the next two days. The energy that was created has been strong and evident by everyone who was in attendance. Take a look at some of the footage from this epic event. I will definitely be present for SITW 2020!
As we enter the middle of April, I sit back and reflect on my time as a blogger. I can’t believe it’s already been four months! I’m so very thankful for every single of you who take the time out to read what I have to say! I couldn’t be more appreciative! Many of you have joined me a little further in, so I wanted to do a fun post about some interesting facts about me!
1. My name is Michelle but most people call me Mimi. The name of my blog, Authentically_Mi, came to me while doing a personality test one night. As I was reading my results, the part that resonated with me the most was the authenticity factor and how I base everything in my life according to that. The name was a perfect fit for who I am.
2. I am a tween mother! My love and light Saniyah is my only child and shes growing up way too fast for me! She will be 12 this summer and its surreal to think next year she will be a teenager. While I had her young and faced many challenges, I never let that stop me. I went on to graduate college magna cum laude as a young mother and I’m so very proud to say my baby girl was accepted into a gifted middle school this past year. It has not been easy by far, but it has made a major impact on who I am today. Anything is possible!
3. My views are unique and I credit that to how I grew up. Its hard for me to explain where I’m from sometimes due to my upbringing. I was a military brat until high school, consistenly moving every 4 to 5 years, several different states and overseas. While I was born on the West Coast in New Mexico, a pivotal point in my growth came while living in Germany, so that feels most like home. I moved here to Virginia in my junior year of high school and have been here ever since.
4. I currently work for the government in public health as a program coordinator. I have been at my job for almost 9 years now and while I love public health, a part of me is ready to see whats out there. My interests have grown into the IT sector and this the direction I plan to go next. I began blogging as a way to express myself and share some of the things I have learned along the way. Since starting in December, it has been a great journey so far
5. If you’ve seen my astrology posts, you may already know that I am a pisces sun, capricorn moon and virgo rising. I got into astrology a few years ago to learn more about myself and I’m still learning. Funny as it sounds, it was how I began my self discovery journey. I enjoy learning about what resonates with me.
6. I am very family oriented, as the first born child of two, I have a pretty close relationship with my family. Because of the military, I didn’t get to grow up around my family, but my summers were cherished because our visits were some of my most fondest memories. I am also an aunt to two newphews!
7. I am an ambivert. An ambivert is both an extrovert and introvert, although I tend to lean more towards the introverted side. I loveeeeee my alone time, maybe a bit too much. I am one of those people who actually loves their own company, other times I can be the life of the party. As an empath, I am very sensitive to the energies around me and I protect my peace as necessary. I am very big on the vibes I get from people because I know that energy doesnt lie. Please don’t kill my vibe is a daily affirmation over here.
8. Some of my hobbies include cooking, eating out and trying new restaurants, wine festivals, theme parks, music festivals, comedy shows, concerts, beach days, reading, writing and blogging, DIY projects, gardening, movies, painting, road trips and my number one love TRAVEL! There is nothing I love more than to go to a foreign land and experience the people, culture and food. I like to get off the resort and explore the area. I am very adventurous for the most part but I don’t like heights.
9. Although I’m not ocd about health, I am pretty conscious of it. I currently workout 3 to 4 days a week in the gym, and 2 days of HIIT cardio at home. HIIT, High Intensity Interval Training, has been an excellent move for cardio. Since my time is pretty limited, I can get a pretty good workout in about 30 minutes. Its all in how hard you push yourself. While I tend to be pretty diciplined with food during the week, I stil try to eat what I want, but in portions. Its helped me to make this a lifestyle change I can stick with. I recently got into herbal remedies for health maintenance and now make own teas that are nourishing and taste good.
10. I am a lover of all things art, music, museums, technology, spirituality, culture and history. I just like learning new things. I believe that we are forever students because there is always something to be learned in life, no matter how old you are. I have a curious mind, so I am always seeking, investigating and researching. Even with purchases, I will read the reviews from several sites and compare several different models all before I make the purchase. OCD I know, but my decisions are well informed, it keeps my mind sharp and its given me knowledge and wisdom in a wide variety of areas.
I hope you learned something of interest about me today. We are over 100 followers as of last week and this is my 20th post! Coincidence or no… lol I like to think of it is synchronicities and confirmation of doing something great. I hope we continue to grow! Tell me a little about yourself? What makes you original?
When I think of happiness, the emotions and feelings of love, joy, laughter, fulfillment and that over the moon feeling comes to mind. Many people seem to have the perception that happiness comes from relationships and I’m here to tell you why that’s total bullshit.
What if I told you that you could achieve that same over the moon feeling 100% by yourself? You see, happiness is purely based on your thoughts, feelings and emotions. No one in this world has the power to MAKE you happy. Sure people can assist and do things to add to it, but we have to make the decision to be happy first. Feelings and emotions shift with the wind and if you aren’t firmly rooted, these shifts will have greater impact on you.
Who wants the burden or responsibility of maintaining someone’s happiness? I know I don’t, and I don’t mean that in a malicious way, but there is freedom in knowing that when you both work on keeping yourselves happy, you come into a partnership to share and grow that happiness because your cup is already overflowing. You aren’t dependent on it because your happiness is self made. True happiness is internal and generated 100% by you. There is liberation in knowing that nobody can take my happiness from me and this is what empowers me to be better. There is nothing stopping or preventing true fulfillment. This is where to apply the “You Can’t Pour From An Empty Cup” rule. This way of thinking may intimidate those who need someone to depend on them for happiness and it shouldnt. The best kind of love is the one who WANTS to be there with no bribery or incentives.
This was one of the major lessons I learned. When you avoid certain parts of yourself, it has a way of showing up in other areas of your life. You will keep dealing with the same issues until you address the root cause of why you dont like being alone. A big part of this problem is many people don’t even know what makes them happy. We spend so much time chasing the bag that we dont leave much time for anything else. Balance here is essential, working hard is important but so is making sure you live a life your happy with. You dont want to spend your life seeking meaningless relationships because your unhappy by yourself. If your feeling this way, the best thing to do is explore that. Spend some time alone and learn to love your own company. Sit in that uncomfortable feeling and start exploring the things that interest you and watch your happiness rise. There are no right or wrong answers here, but its for your own enlightenment to heal your wounds so you can grow and move forward.
My hope is that this has inspired someone to look within themselves and make the decision to be happy regardless of their circumstances! Happiness is only a thought away
I had every intention this week on writing about happiness being an inside job but the energy I’ve felt this week has led me a different direction. This message has been heavy on my heart the last few days. The world lost an incredibly great man this week. Nipsey Hustle was much more than a rapper. He was a man all about his family, his growth, but most importantly changing the narrative of his past and bridging his community. He was gunned down this week by a friend turned foe in the very same community he was uplifting. I couldn’t help but think about how sometimes the enemy isn’t a stranger watching you from a far.. the enemy is a sinister foe within your own circle.
Being mindful of the company you keep is our best defense from people who pretend to love us but mean us no good. Even then there still are no guarantees in life. I like to believe that everything happens for a reason and God doesn’t make mistakes. I know there is a bigger lesson here and maybe it has everything to do with the work he was engaged in and the legacy he leaves behind. Its a hard pill to swallow when you believe in the law of attraction and you watch someone do all the right things and the absolute worst happens to them. This is what devastates me most.
We have to become better at screening people and their intentions on a continuous basis. Even the longest of friendships can become your downfall when the motives change and sadly there usually aren’t any announcements when that change occurs. I’m blessed to have solid people around me, but there are also those few that I question. Some I’ve known forever and maintain a sort of loyalty to due to the years invested but I’ve noticed the energy and vibe has shifted and it doesnt always mesh with where I’m at in my life now. I protect my peace viciously so any threat to that is removed. My personal journey on ascending into the better version of me has exposed a lot of weak connections. Everyone isn’t meant to stand the test of time and continue the journey with you.
Changing and letting go is hard, its especially hard for me but I’m learning to be more objective about it and not take it so personal. Holding onto people not meant for you will cause you more harm than good. It saddens me when people have such low communication and conflict resolution skills that you resort to violence, destroying their family, your own and the community you call home. We are living in a wicked world and sometimes I worry having to raise my child in this chaos. My daughter and I had our first bully situation last year from a girl she called her best friend for several years and my daughter was devastated. I will always teach my child to lead by morals and values, to treat others how she wants to be treated, but that’s only one part. I have absolutely no control of how her peers are raised. Bullying is such a huge issue in our schools, to the point where children are taking their own lives. I teach my child to stand up for herself and to be aware of the behaviors and actions of others and to stand firm in what she knows is right. I am teaching her young what I learned late and that’s to never be afraid to walk away from someone that violates her values.
This is the best time to start leading by example. Be the change you wish to see and show others its possible with your actions. We have more power than we realize. Although I wish this world were more peaceful and everyone got along, it just isn’t reality all the time and we must prepare and protect ourselves. I am angered by the senseless way Nipsey lost his life, but lets not make it in vain. Continue to do the work he started but in your own community. He definitely planted the seed.
A brand dedicated to authenticity, self love, self discovery, healing, empowerment and travel